


Tobirama Addams

by LunarCatNinja



Category: Addams Family - All Media Types, Naruto
Genre: Grandmama Frump Mentioned, Morticia Addams Mentioned, People react to Tobirama as an Addams, Senju Touka Mentioned, This is a drabble series, Tobirama like canon but MORE, now with a guest appearance, who comes with a pun in the chapter summary
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-09-26
Packaged: 2019-10-08 05:21:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17380370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunarCatNinja/pseuds/LunarCatNinja
Summary: A series of drabbles, not in a linear order timeline wise, of a universe where Tobirama is born an Addams and all that entails.





	1. And there were Muffins

“Do you have any idea where they came from?” Hashirama asks Madara who was on patrol earlier that day. “No and no one seems to know who left them and how they got in and out without notice either” Madara replied annoyed. “That’s not good. If someone could manage to sneak in here and leave these then-”

Suddenly the door opens and a white haired figures walks in. “Anija I have some paperwork for you to sign and- oh. Food. I’m starving now that I’m thinking about it. I haven’t eaten since yesterday” Tobirama says as he grabs and eats one of the muffins before Hashirama and Madara could react.

“Tobi! No! Those are poisoned!” Hashirama exclaims in horror. Tobirama smacks his lips and replies “Yeah. Tastes like cyanide. Nice almondy flavor. I wish I had the recipe. Anyway I do need these papers signed so?” Madara lets out a strangled noise of disbelief as Tobirama casually finishes the first muffin and starts to eat another one. Hashirama sighs. “Fine. I’ll get them done. You might as well finish the muffins. Ignore me and how I keep forgetting about that strange poison immunity you got from mother’s side of the family. Strange people those Addams...”

Madara, who was continuing to splutter in the background completely ignored, pales at Hashirama's exasperated admittance to being related to the Addams family. "Wait you're related to _who?_ Suddenly so much about you two makes so much more sense."

“And what is _that_ supposed to mean?” Tobirama asks icily. “Nothing!” Madara panics, flailing his arms in a comical manner. “Hmm” Tobirama gives a suspicious glare as he grabs another muffin to eat and takes a bite. “Done Tobi! Make sure no one else eats any of those muffins okay?” Hashirama interrupts as he hands back the papers that were brought in. “There isn’t any _more_ paperwork is there?” he asks hesitantly. “No Anija, that was all. I’ll leave you and Madara to continue whatever it was you were doing when I came in. Presumably _work_ right?” Tobirama answers threateningly.

“It was! We were actually trying to figure out who left the poisoned muffins you are eating.” Hashirama rushes to assure, flailing his arms in a placating manner similar to how Madara did earlier. “Oh that’s easy. Didn’t you see the note? Grandmother Morticia made them for us. Or me more likely as you know how she thinks I don’t eat enough” Tobirama says blandly.

“Oh. OH. I… See. Thank you for clearing that up little brother! Better get back to work ha ha ha…” Hashirama responds weakly. Tobirama nods briskly then heads out taking the muffins with him. Meanwhile Madara just looks at Hashirama in horror while mentally going over the fact that his best friend is the grandson to the Addams Family Matriarch.

“So that happened. Want to forget about it over a nice couple glasses of Sake?” Hashirama asks. “Try bottles Hashiram. Bottles.” Madara retorts.


	2. Cooking Adventures Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a simple food is made, and made poorly. And Izuna learns to fear Tobirama's stomach.

“I really think I did it to your specifications this time Anija!”

‘It was such a nice day’ Hashirama mused as he listened to his brother try and defend his latest attempt at cooking edible food. Not that his brother couldn’t eat what he cooked mind you. It’s just… While Tobirama can eat, and actually _enjoys_ the horrors he calls food, other people get horribly sick. Worse than anything that can be called food poisoning by normal standards in fact. ‘Grandmother Morticia and Mother always did say Tobi inherited Great Grandmama Frump’s skills with cooking’ eyeing the seemingly normal food Hashirama finishes his thoughts ‘if that could be _called_ cooking skills.’

“Well? Aren’t you going to try it? It looks right. It smells right. It even tastes all plain and boring like when Mito makes it using this recipe!” Tobirama gives puppy eyes at his brother in a vain attempt to convince his brother to try his food. “No Tobi. I’m still queasy from the _last_ attempt you made at making edible food.” With a look of outrage Tobirama retorts “I can eat it all just fine! It’s perfectly edible! You just have horrible taste!”

“What are you two going on about now?” Madara asks apprehensively as he walks into the room followed by his own brother. “Hashirama is being a coward” Tobirama states with a glare towards his brother, “my cooking is perfectly fine.” Madara, remembering The Muffin Incident, eyes the seemingly normal rice porridge with suspicion. “Is it poisoned?” he asks. “No Tobi just made it that’s all” Hashirama replied.

“Is it fresh ingredients?” Izuna asks, to which Tobirama confirms. “Then he can’t have screwed it up that easily” Izuna says as he grabs the spoon and takes a bite.

Everyone looks at Izuna with suspense in their eyes. “Why are you looking at me like that I’m fi-” Izuna cuts off with a sudden lurch and a nauseated expression on his face.

“IZUNA!!!” Madara and Hashirama shout as Tobirama looks on in confused disappointment. Hashirama rushes to check Izuna over only to stare at him in bewilderment. “Huh… He’s only got a case of normal food poisoning. He’ll be fine.”

“How is that fine?!” Madara seethes.

“Because normally Tobi’s cooking leaves people rather… Eh… Let’s just say that they don’t make it back to being one-hundred percent. Some of it is the trauma.” Hashirama retorts calmly before he goes to help Izuna with his food poisoning. “See? This is why we don’t eat Tobi’s food. If you saw what he _normally_ eats then you wouldn’t want to even _contemplate_ trying _any_ of his cooking.”

With his piece said and Izuna taken care of Hashirama turns to Madara “make sure he gets plenty of bed rest and fluids and he’ll be fine.” Hashirama then turns to Tobirama “and as for _you_ little brother… Stop trying to make people or trick people into eating your food. It’s food only an Addams can enjoy.

“ _FINE!_ ” Tobirama replies angrily before walking off in a huff.  
“Well that could have gone better” Hashirama states as Madara looks at him in disbelief and Izuna groans in the background.

.

~Some Weeks Later/Omake~

.

“ _WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SENJU????_ ” Izuna shrieks in terror looking at Tobirama’s lunch. Tobirama pauses with his food half way to his mouth and wiggling. Looking at it hesitantly he replies “my… lunch? What do you expect it to be Uchiha?”

“Lunch?? LUNCH?! It’s GLOWING and WIGGLING _and is that an eye blinking at me?????_ ”

“Honestly it’s like you’ve never seen decent cooking before.” And with that Tobirama goes back to eating his food, ignoring Izuna and his sputtering.


	3. Redo and New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A drabble announcement that became it's own drabble. Finally an explanation for Hashirama's not so Addamsness.

Previously In a Village Hidden in the Leaves:

~

“I wonder what Mother wants.” Hashirama says, pacing his office while his brother watches on with an exasperated expression on his face. “Why must she want something to visit?” Tobirama counters with a sigh.

“She _always_ wants something when she visits! Always!” While Hashirama flails he doesn’t notice the door opening to let in a small, pale figure, with long black hair and a deadpan expression. Her black dress drifts in a non-existent wind as she glides inside the room, giving it a sense of dread.

“Sons.” Hashirama turns around in horror at the curt hello while Tobirama moves in to hug his mother. When he reaches arm’s length from her there is a blur and a spark as their blades cross.   
“Such a proper welcome. At least from one of my children.” The newly revealed Wednesday Addams turns to give a dark stare at Hashirama. “Now if only my eldest could act like a proper Addams. There is never a day I do not rage at the Sage for messing with your Addams Inheritance.” Hashirama gives a weak chuckle at that before replying “Well considering there was a fate already decided for my birth it could be said that you messed with his plans and not the other way around?”

At her rapidly darkening look he hurries to add, “But of course Addams gets priority right?” With a hopeful grin he glances at Tobirama quickly before focusing back on his mother. Wednesday just sniffs disdainfully before focusing back on Tobirama and ignoring Hashirama. “If only that were true of his Addams blood over that Chakra false reincarnation, but at least I have a proper heir. Now on to business.” At that, both Tobirama and Hashirama look to their mother in expectation. “As an Addams I take great pleasure in announcing the Tobirama Addams drabbles series now has its own story with a brand new drabble.” Hashirama looks at his mother just as blankly as she looked when she made her announcement. Tobirama just cocks his head at the casual use of breaking the fourth wall.

With a small curtsy, Wednesday turns around and pauses by the door. “Have fun throwing things and making the Uchiha sweat.” With her final piece said, she walks out the room leaving her sons behind. 

“So that happened.” Tobirama says with a casual indifference. Hashirama just places his head in his hands and groans.

“Wait. Why do I feel like this has happened before?” Hashirama looks to Tobirama for an answer. “Déjà vu Anija. Déjà vu.” With his piece said, Tobirama walks out of the room leaving his brother to stare blankly at nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up making the "announcement" it's own drabble because it got too long. Chapter 4 and onward will be just like chapters 1 and 2.


	4. YEET!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which something that should not be able to be thrown is thrown, and the Uchiha Clan as a whole get flustered. The Senju Clan is confused.

This was it. The battle to determine which clan would come out on top. He could _feel it_. It was only a matter of time unti- “The hell?!” Izuna’s eyes widen as he sees a giant nine-tailed fox- _is it the one from legend? He doesn’t understand_ \- comes crashing through the trees.

“GET LOST!” Tobirama grabs the fox and then tosses it far into the distance past where the eye, even one with a Sharingan, can see. Calmly dusting off his hands Tobirama turns to look at Izuna standing dumbstruck. “What?” A pause. “Are you okay you look a bit out of it and… red. Are you sick?” A worried look appears on his face.

“Fine! I’m fine! Totally fine!” Izuna can feel his face all red and discreetly looks around only to realize the rest of his clan isn’t much better. “How… How long have you been that strong? Just wondering! You don’t have to answer!” Chuckling nervously Izuna tries to ignore how the rest of his clan leans in to hear the answer. “Hm… Since… I was around 13? 10 if you count using chakra to multiply my strength.” At this the entire Uchiha clan lets out small quiet whimpers. “Wait you mean you did that just now _without using chakra?_ ” Unsure Tobirama looks around, finally noticing how the rest of the Uchiha were looking at him with gobsmacked expressions as his own clan looks at each other in confusion at the Uchiha Clan’s strange behavior.

“Yes? I do not understand what the big deal is.” Tobirama looks to Hashirama trying to convey his confusion and silently asking for clarification. Hashirama just sighs, shaking his head, and then shrugging at Tobirama. The Uchiha let out strangled whimpers.

“Say Hashirama? You were discussing peace right? Let’s do that.” The Senju within earshot all turn to Madara in shock at that sudden announcement while the Uchiha clan within hearing range all nod excitedly.

“Really? You mean it? Oh that’s great Madara!” Hashirama grins at Madara and then hugs him tightly while Madara just looks at Tobirama in a glazed manner. “Yeah… peace… Let’s do that.” He murmurs, continuing his vacant staring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place before the previous drabbles chronologically, because this is actually how peace between clans came to be.


	5. Why Tobirama isn't allowed to help with payback.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Kage88 made a comment about Madara asking Tobirama to help get payback on Hashirama, Touka, and Izuna for spreading rumors about the True Reason Madara asked for peace. This is my crackish response to that idea.

“I need payback.” Tobirama turns to look at Madara and cocks his head in question. “Your brother and cousin, and MY brother have been spreading rumors and I need to pay them back for it.” Tobirama nods while humming contemplatively.

“I’ll help. There is no payback quite like an Addams payback.” At that announcement Madara backtracked. “No no! I meant more like a prank!” Tobirama raises an eyebrow at the sputtering. “Fine. An Addams Prank is just as good.” Nodding decisively, he starts off before turning to Madara to silently question whether or not he was coming.

With a sigh, Madara starts to follow Tobirama. “This is going to end poorly.” Tobirama just grins in response.

~

Fire. There was fire and smoke and screaming. Madara stands in horrified awe at the chaos that was all around him caused by the village’s resident Addams. “How did he even _do_ this?? There are stone blocks on fire. Even the Uchiha can’t catch _stone_ on fire!” Pulling on his hair Madara turns to Mito standing beside him. “I’m so sorry. I knew this would backfire, but I didn’t think it would end so horribly!” With a frozen smile and leaking killer intent Mito turns from the chaos to look at Tobirama in the distance. “Yes. Well. Now you know better than to give Tobirama _ideas_. You’ll also help rebuild _my home_ now won’t you?” Turning back to Madara, Mito gives him a sweet smile filled with the promise of violence.

“Yes ma’am!” Madara gives Mito a wide eyed look as she turns back to the fires burning her home. “If it makes you feel any better, Hashirama will be sleeping at Touka’s home while you rebuild.” A pause. “Isn’t her house also on fire?” A chilling smile. “Yes.” Madara gives another wide-eyed look. “Oh.” Turning back to the fires Madara puts the thought out of his mind. ‘Serves him right. Izuna will be sleeping there too.’

“Someone should probably intervene before someone actually gets hurt… I don’t think I’ve ever heard Hashirama scream in outrage like that before.”

“Thank you for volunteering Madara. Go get your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my-!” At Mito’s cold look Madara turns away with a grunt. “Fine. I’ll go get him. If only because my brother and Touka are looking rather stabby.”

“Sounds good. And for future reference when Tobirama starts grinning, you need to start warning people. Mostly me, so I can deal with it _before_ it gets to this point.” Madara hns in sheepish agreement before walking determinedly towards where Tobirama is batting off his three targets. ‘Well.’ Madara muses, ‘At least I know for future reference who _not_ to bring up revenge plots with.’

Taking in the surrounding chaos as he walks he continues his thoughts, ‘unless I _want_ all out destruction and madness.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the record I don't have a beta, and I only read over my writing a couple times before posting. Sometimes I'll spread that over a couple of days, but most of the time I reread it as I write it, and then post once I'm done. So if you see spelling errors or a past tense in the casual writing (I try to write with present tense.) then feel free to let me know.


	6. Be the Victim All Your Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tobirama deals with an annoyance, and then has tea with his mother.

“And then _I_ said, if you don’t like it you can just go to my father’s dungeons. It’s dreary. Like this awful weather.” This delightfully dreadful day is once again interrupted by the grating voice of the Daimyo’s daughter. Tobirama considers how he got into this mess, but he can’t seem to remember…

“Honestly I don’t see how you can stand it, but I suppose- Hey! Are you even listening to me?” Ignoring her growing ire, Tobirama looks to the sky, but not even the dark clouds and the promise of rain can give him the answers he seeks.

Suddenly Tobirama shifts to the side just in time to avoid an unfortunate slap from the rapidly enraged hime. 

“I’m sorry m’lady, did you say something?” Tobirama deadpans.

This just seems to infuriate her more, and just as it seems things might get _interesting_ Hashirama rushes up to them, apparently done with his meeting. Oh right. A _meeting_ is why Tobirama had to babysit. Smiling at finally remembering the reason he was here, Tobirama greets his brother. Who proceeds to ignore him to try and appease the hime. Hm. How rude. Losing his smile, Tobirama thinks that perhaps he could finally pay attention to what is being said…

“-and THEN he had the nerve to ask me if I said anything! I am a victim of poor manners! That’s what I am. A victim of his horrible, uncaring, and rude manners! Is that what you want me to be? A victim?!” At the end of her shrieking there is but a pause. Then, “all your life.” 

As one, Hashirama and the hime turn to look at Tobirama. “What,” she starts, “did you just say?” At her frankly amazing icy look, Tobirama takes a moment to admire the fact that someone so prissy and spoiled can look so cold, before repeating himself, “I said all your life.” Understanding that they must not realize what he meant, Tobirama clarified, “You’ll have to deal with all sorts of people and manners all your life, so you will be a victim of such all your life.” 

The hime didn’t seem to like that. Her face rapidly starts to redden before Hashirama starts to usher her away. Already having lost interest, Tobirama just continues on his way now that Hashirama had the hime. She really is rather annoying, so perhaps… Nah. He’ll leave treason for another day. He has experiments to get back to after all.

~~~

A few weeks later Tobirama is having tea with his mother who only smirks when told of the Incident, as Hashirama has taken to calling it. So what if the Daimyo was upset about the apparent lack of respect towards his daughter? Respect is earned, not freely given. When asking his mother if she ever had to deal with such a thing, Wednesday Addams thinks about it before regaling Tobirama of her own adventure as a child at a summer camp where she encountered her own lifelong victim.

“The poor girl had a nervous breakdown a few years back in fact,” Wednesday says before sipping her tea and continuing, “she kept claiming that a demonic girl was haunting her. Walking along her walls and ceilings, and holding a bloody katana.” As she says this, she shifts the katana in her lap a bit with a wicked glint in her eye. “Honestly, who would believe something like that?” Tobirama shares a dark chuckle with his mother over the blatant implication. “Who would believe that indeed?” He responds with a wry smirk. ‘Well who would believe it outside the Elemental Nations?’ he thinks. 

Perhaps he also ought to think some more on the hime and her... victimness. 'Mother is a great source of inspiration after all.' And with that last thought, Tobirama delves deeper into conversation with his mother, enjoying his time with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I am still working on the chapter to follow the next one for What is in a Name?, and on the next Tobirama Addams drabble. I have good progress on both though! Inktober is coming up however, so once again I'll be getting distracted by Art Things, but if you want to see those, then head over to my tumblr around that time. I will aim to do as many days as I can. I will try to get at least one more chapter out for something before then if I can.


	7. An Addams House Runs True

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Madara and Izuna get invited to Tobirama's house for dinner. No one expects a Thing.

Lightning cracks the sky and thunder roars. Madara and Izuna suppress full body shivers as they stare at Tobirama’s house. What an unfortunate place to hold a dinner.

“It looks like a cross between those stereotypical mad scientist houses you see in those Kumo play backdrops and a castle.” Madara’s eye twitches as he is unable to deny Izuna’s statement. “It’s definitely not quite what I was expecting...” Turning to look at his brother, Izuna’s stare tells Madara exactly what he thinks about that statement.

Huffing defensively Madara turns back to the… house. It’s not a _bad_ house. So what if it was creaky and creepy, and had strange weather patterns around it… Right? A loud blast of unnatural thunder is all Madara gets in response to his thoughts.

Gulping Madara steadies his nerves before marching forward with Izuna.

This was a mistake.

Fast forward past all the unfortunate sprung traps and monsters that are _unnatural_ and _should never have existed, what the fuck Tobirama???_ Ehem. After all the unpleasantness of not knowing Tobirama’s home, Madara and Izuna finally sit down for dinner.

Dinner that Tobirama made. 

Staring down in horror at the living… thing… in front of them that is trying to pass as their meal, Madara and Izuna try to consider how to talk their way out of eating when a hand plops down from the ceiling. The Uchiha brothers stare at the hand and the hand stares back. How it can stare when there is no eyes they can’t tell, but they _know_ that it is staring at them. It’s creepy. Why? Just why? Slowly turning their gaze from the hand to Tobirama, who is eating without care, Izuna starts twitching as Madara takes several breaths to try and rein in his panic. He fails.

“WHAT THE FUCK SENJU?!?!?!” 

Tobirama merely looks at them in vague confusion, all the while still chewing his food. When it becomes obvious that he isn’t going to explain, Madara grinds his teeth before demanding “Why is there a living hand plopping down onto the table???” This only gets him a slow blink from the crazy man in front of them. “That’s Thing,” is all he says before resuming his meal.

Thing is a good descriptor, Madara thinks in a strange mix of apathy and horror. He’s getting too used to these things, he decides. Sighing, Madara feels a shift in his head and decides that if he wants to actually beat out his clansmen who want to date Tobirama, then he had better get used to things like his cooking. Picking up his fork to eat whatever is in front of him, he also decides that he doesn’t care anymore. He _won’t_ care anymore. Hashirama will just pump his stomach later anyway.

Ignoring Izuna’s look of horrified disbelief, Madara takes a bite of his food. Then pauses. Humming slightly, he considers his food and then takes another bite. Then another.

Turns out the food is actually edible this time. 

Disregarding Izuna’s sputtering next to him, Madara hums in contentment at the small smile Tobirama sends his way at eating his food. Tobirama asks him how the food is, and Madara just replies that it’s surprisingly tasty. This gets him an even bigger smile. Score! 

After dinner, Tobirama offers to take Madara on a tour of his home, to which Madara agrees. They both leave Izuna in the kitchen with his untouched food. 

~~~ 

Izuna watches his brother leave with his Rival. Once they are out of sight, he turns back to his… Food. The hand thing took off sometime after his brother actually started _eating_ the dinner that was prepared for them, and Izuna feels very worried about that. Hands shouldn’t move like that. Hands shouldn’t move _at all_ unless attached to a body! 

Twitching, and glancing around nervously, Izuna slowly turns back to his plate. Picking up his fork, he takes a tentative bite of his food before rushing to the nearby trash can. Which let out spiders when he opened it. Izuna is so done with this place. Turning around, Izuna shrieks as he sees that not only is the hand back, but it is also cleaning up their plates. What the fuck. _How_ the fuck? Izuna feels like crying. 

~~~ 

Completely unaware of the building stress Izuna is suffering from, Madara and Tobirama are actually having a pleasant time. After a rough start where Madara almost got impaled by a suit of armor, and had a painting try to eat him, he started understanding where to step to avoid all the traps. This in turn seems to only please Tobirama more. Another point for Madara, so take that clansmen! Madara grins in satisfaction. 

Turning a corner and side stepping an anvil that came out of nowhere, Madara looks on impressed at the labs Tobirama shows him. How could he ever think this was a bad idea? 

~~~ 

Back to Izuna, the poor man is curled in a fetal position in a hallway. He knew this was a mistake. He can’t leave. He can’t leave. Everything is out to kill him! And the hand won’t. Stop. _Tugging on his clothes!_ Brushing the hand off, Izuna gets up and then once again tries to go down the hallway towards where he remembers the front door. The floor opens up beneath him and his last thought before hitting his head on the way down is that he hopes his brother is as miserable as he. 

Not that he is. 

Madara is, against what everyone would expect before this evening started, having a great time. If anyone else saw some of Tobirama’s experiments, they would have taken off running. Madara hasn’t noticed, but he is slowly becoming more like an Addams. Tobirama approves. He’s sure his mother will too once he introduces them. 

Neither remembers poor Izuna. Luckily for him though, Thing managed to activate one of Tobirama’s clean up automatons and use them to bring Izuna out. Unluckily for him, they put him in the trash bin. Where he won’t be found until the garbage disposal corps come by in the morning. 

Madara and Tobirama are not bothered by this though. They are too immersed in sciencey shenanigans with each other to care. This will in turn bode ill for those who bother them in the future, but that’s a story for another time. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as promised, here is an update before I go away into Art Land for Inktober and holiday art events. I hope to update a story sometime after New Years, but it might take until March. I am a slow writer. Next one on my list to be updated is What is in a Name? so look forward to that!

**Author's Note:**

> First two chapters are slightly edited (mostly some past tenses got changed to present tense to match the rest) and moved from the Idea Dump drabble series. Chapter 3 has an explanation for why Hashirama isn't more Addams-like that is also in the Idea Dump (a few sentences are added here that weren't in the Idea Dump), and then a new drabble for the series. Any new Tobirama Drabbles will be posted here instead of the Idea Dump.


End file.
